Being a mom and staying fit often feel like two pieces of a puzzle that just do not fit together. The last time I went to a gym, I had zero children. Now, I have three and I’m lucky if I can find both of my sneakers amidst the pile of kid’s shoes. Yet, I constantly see advertisements of fit moms, gleaming with joy as the exercise in perfectly lit settings, baiting me with hope that 'I can do it too!' This, is not one of those posts. This is real life.
Without further ado- here is my personal four step plan to staying fit as a mom.
Step One: I start my day by making an easy breakfast: gluten free waffles or bagel, then share it with three scavenging sharks that have their own breakfasts, which they never finish, nevertheless, they insist on sampling and eating my food.
Of course, I could make a second waffle, but there simply isn't time, and I have to get to the grocery store anyway.
Step Two: Always pick the shopping cart with a bad wheel. You know, the one that got hit by a car a few times in the parking lot? Then load your kids into the cart and start pushing it. You’re sure to feel your abs engaged and your arms will be shaking by the time you hit aisle three, and your sanity will probably left in the frozen food section. But, it's ok, you just burned a zillion calories.
Step Three: Don't sleep, for years. Now, the science behind this is fuzzy, but in my opinion, being awake to feed a baby every few hours is a good way to lose pounds fast. Your metabolism is forced to work, and work, and work, and never rest. You are a mom after all, it fits the M.O..
Step Four: Take your kids to do fun things. Then run around like a maniac making sure they don't run into parking lots or fall into ponds, all while you wonder why you bring them out to do 'fun' things in the first place. You'll burn more calories that way.
The first results you will notice are not feeling guilty about your lack of time to devote to fitness. Before long, fitness will be as easy as wearing shape-up shoes.
Don't forget: the key to seeing amazing results with this routine is to stick to it. Like anything, persistence, or insanity, is key.
Happy Hump Day!
Is a wife, mother of three, author of Re:Birth, and lover of afternoon naps and phish food ice cream.